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Just Like A Kid In A Candy Store At Freak Lunchbox

Childhood fantasy time: to be put in front of a candy counter full of chocolate bars, licorice whips and jujubes and be told, by some benevolent relative or Daddy Warbucks-type, “have at it, grab whatever you want—go nuts.” Am I right? As a little one, I couldn’t think of anything better, save for being told the same thing, but in a toy store.

At the newly opened Freak Lunchbox, you can combine the two long-held fantasies to fabulous effect. You may have to pay for the privilege yourself (what did you expect? You’re an adult now), but what a privilege it is! Walking into the Willy Wonka-ed shop on St. Laurent is a full-on sensory assault of bright colours, loud music, and candy, candy, candy. There is so much candy, in fact, that some of it has to be stapled to the ceiling.

Not to be outdone by the sweet stuff, you’ll also find nostalgic novelties of all sorts: Garbage Pail Kids cards, fake teeth, itching powder, hand buzzers, Gumby and Pokey collectables, and the eternally classic plastic dog poop.

But back to les cochonneries! I dare you to walk in, past the immense shrines to all things PEZ and Jelly Belly, past the rows of bulk-binned gummies and licorice, past the freeze-dried space ice cream and scorpion lollipops, through the stacks of chocolate, caramel and toffee everything, and not be tempted to taste one single, solitary item.

Believe you me, this Halifax-born boutique chain of confectionary bliss leaves no craving unsated. Feeling forlorn for the far-flung flavours of the UK? Freak Lunchbox has you covered with Polo mints, Galaxy bars and Walkers crisps. Need a little taste of the good ol’ U.S. of A.? Run immediately to the Main and get yourself a Whatchamacallit or rainbow-coloured Astropop.

[Credit: Freak Lunchbox]
 

To wash it all down (and to further your descent into a diabetic coma), ask for one of the store’s thick n’ creamy milkshakes. Or perhaps, to be more in the holiday spirit, grab a gingerbread soda—bacon candy cane used as festive accoutrement, optional.

Freak Lunchbox
3680 Blvd Saint-Laurent
http://www.freaklunchbox.com